Seventh Inning Stretch

Greetings friends. And you aren't just friends. You're followers. I mean, you follow my blog. I appreciate that. I have been wracking my brain (or racking it depending on how you look at it) over the past four or five days trying to find a topic that would be fun to write, interesting to read and would please you, my seventeen followers. When I told Mike that I was stepping into the office to blog he gently reminded me that I said I would only blog when I had something to say. Oh Mike, that was before I had followers. Seventeen of them! The guy has no appreciation for celebrity. My goodness, I'm in it for the fans. It's all about the fans. They want the Squeaky Voice, I gotta give them the Squeaky Voice. The truth is, dear followers, it doesn't matter if I'm tired, or hungry, or completely without anything interesting to write, it's not about me, it's about you, it's all about you, my devoted fans.

Speaking of fans, today I went into Target to spend a gift card. I roamed around aimlessly past purses, clothes and finally found myself in the home department. I was looking at baskets and tables and just moseying along when there it was. A canvas of Yankee Stadium. Seeing Yankee Stadium hits a certain nerve that only well conditioned Bostonians can relate to...my thought process went something like...Yankee Stadium? in Gig Harbor Washington? How pathetic is that? Why on Earth...oh wait what's that? Wrigley Field? Less offensive, but still ridiculous. This is WASHINGTON for god sake...wait, wait, wait, if Wrigley field and Yankee Stadium are here then......Suddenly my heart started to race with excitement. I began rifling through the photographs until finally (insert singing angels here) FENWAY PARK. A beautiful photo of the Green Monster. God these people in Washington have great taste in sports. It was the only one there, the truth is that Target probably had fifty this morning, but they all sold out. I scooped that bad bird up and headed for the cash register. Now some people when buying a large wall hanging might hold it facing in, and some people might hold it at chest level to be sure to have a good grip on it. Some might even hide it away in their shopping carriage. But, it's Fenway Park, so I did what any extremely sane person would do. I hoisted it over my head and started singing Sweet Caroline.

Then I decided to myself, you know what, it wouldn't be fair to all the shoppers in Target if I just headed over and paid, some of these good folks haven't seen my find. So I proceeded to take the long way around the store. I headed through the toy department. Don't worry, I was friendly, I didn't want anyone to feel badly that I was having a far superior shopping trip than they were. I said things like "Hey nice spiderman" or "Gosh is that talking Dora? I love her." And when they sweetly asked "Hey crazy lady why are you prancing around with that scoreboard over your head?" I just patted them on the head and said "Not just a score board sweetie, The Green Monster". Okay, I am exaggerating, I didn't pat them on the head, if I did I would have dropped my picture.

Next, I headed through the electronics department, people saw me and gasped...probably because they were so happy for me. In the card department somebody said something about me needing to be committed. "Don't worry," I said, "of course I am committed." Did they really doubt me?Geez. When I finally reached the cash register I was worn out. Sweat was dripping from my forehead and my Big League Chew had completely lost its flavor. It was pure adrenaline (and one of those huge peanut butter M&M cookies) that got me through the next few hours.

Once back in the clubhouse, I mean once I was home, my amazing husband hung the picture for me in the very honorable location of the downstairs bathroom. Now it can be enjoyed by our family and all of our guests. In fact, you are welcome to come see it anytime. Maybe on fan appreciation night? I am planning to give out Squeaky Voice bobbleheads to the first 17 fans who show up.